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The Charred Ones are fans of Dancing With The Stars. We’re such fans we spell it out and leave the acronym to the DWTS lazy.

Mya should win that ugly little mirror ball trophy. We like Donny Osmond and Kelly Osborne too…but they’re no Mya. If she doesn’t win it’s because of Dmitry’s Hairspray idea.

Mya, Mya, Mya. Win or lose you should have gone with your gut. It was written all over your Hairspray dancing face. Vegas would’ve been more you and less whatever the hell was in Dmitry’s brain.

We don’t like this. The link won’t work and we think that’s fitting. Hiss. Boo.

[Non-working Hairspray Routine Link Be Here]

We like this. It makes our eyes grin and one charred ass shimmy shake…a lot. 

Mya, we love you and one of us really, really, loves your booty.  Dmitry you suck and one of us is filing down her fingernails and taking off her earrings to kick yours.

Don’t mess with us. We’re The Charred Ones.

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