What is your impression of giving a 16 year-old a four hundred thousand dollar racing automobile? Can there be any long terms repercussions to spoiling our children with material things?
Unless you’ve been underneath a boulder, you’ve heard that hip-hop artist/actor and entrepeneur Sean “P. Diddy” Combs’ gave a crush new Maybach to his son, Justin Dior Combs, for his sixteenth birthday. Reports have it costing anywhere between $300,000-$400,000. That’s just too damn much.
Personally, I belong to the school that spoiling a child is not a good idea…and really? I’ve always thought that it has more to do with parents’ issues than the child. Many parents take great pride in saying they’ve “spoiled their child rotten”. That statement alone is a contradiction in logical thinking to me!
Children that continually get what they want and everything they don’t even ask for grow into impossible adults, where the cold world will not necessarily have the same plans in mind for them as their parents did. So why would a parent want to raise their children this way?
I subscribe to the common definition of spoiled: overindulging whereby creating a willful or selfish mindset and behavior due to having been overindulged. It’s the failure to balance needs, desires and the like with a healthy dose of special treats and to give only because you can without consideration of “what is best” and or appropriate.
There isn’t a handbook nor a manual that comes with rising children and I must say that good old-fashioned common sense is a great help. However, in my opinion spoiling a child does not have balance or life-lessons attached to abundant giving. Rather the type of parental indulgence I’m thinking of has more to do with a need to demonstrate their ability to give. Oftentimes it’s a means to overcompensate for other things they have failed to give their child/children, like buying a gift because they didn’t make it to the child’s play/game.
Then, there are also those who dote and give their children anything they wish for in order to be the favorite parent in the child’s eyes. Parenting at its core is time consuming and no gift can make up for lost moments in time in a child’s life.
I favor Bill Gates’ approach. He believes in a good model where parents are always communicating and doing things together which gives children a picture of a family team. It works like magic in co-parenting your children. Mr. and Mrs. Gates have publicly stated that “it’s very important that we instill in our kids that it has nothing to do with their name or their situation that they’re growing up in; it has to do with who they are as an individual…I think we’ve got the right set-up for them. They have a lot of close friends, they have a lot of close family. I think we’re doing the best we can at providing them with a normal environment.”
The Gates offspring will be left $10 million each by their billionaire parents. Bill Gates has always said that, like Carnegie, he will give away most of his fortune before he dies. He plans to make sure his children are well taken care of but doesn’t want to leave them the burden of tremendous wealth.
Like I said, I subscribe to his way of child-rearing. Growing up without every kind of bell and whistle doesn’t harm children. In fact, it can help motivate them into productive human beings over a life span.